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Exploring Your New Identity Following Divorce

Objective

To identify interests and positive qualities as you create a new identity following divorce.

You Should Know

Divorce is a major life transition, an event that shifts your status, your roles, and your identity. Transitions mark the endings of old phases and the beginning of new ones, producing changes in your life trajectory.

A major transition like divorce will cause you to rethink your identity.

Your identity answers the following questions: “Who are you?” and “What does it mean to be you?” Identity includes the basic values that shape the choices you make and what you value related to relationships, career, and more.

You might hold many identities: parent, partner, teacher, or friend, for example.

When you divorce, you might experience an identity crisis. Not only do you lose your spouse, but also your lifestyle and way of being in the world.

Your identity is closely connected to your relationships.

So, when relationships change, how is your identity affected? You are no longer someone’s spouse, you file your taxes differently, and you might have less money to spend – affecting the way you live your life and see yourself.

Your identity as a parent might change, and you might even lose friends. The key is to recognize your identity will change the following divorce, and take proactive steps to create a new identity.

If you connected your identity to your ex-spouse, you might feel lost when the relationship ends.

This can be the ending of a relationship but the beginning of many things to come.